How long does it take for someone to be allowed to change? How long must one wait to condemn their own previous actions? What’s the time frame until one doesn’t have to be considered “that person” anymore?
All this is dependent upon each person. Some are quick to forgive and others hold onto other’s mistakes or past behaviors. Why? There’s is a myriad of reasons why one would choose not to forgive. Blame it on the amount of pain the person caused, the length of time the actions occurred for, the unbelief that someone can change regardless of time, or holding onto this perception of them in an attempt to hinder that person from becoming better. When someone is constantly treated as who they used to be it’s hard for them to become someone new. If the past behavior is someone they shouldn’t be, then why remind them of or hold them to that perception.
Unbelief in the ability for someone to change can cause one to tempt the others “darkness” to see if it’s still there. Once the “old self” flashes it’s faint existence, the tempter parades their triumph in being able to expose, what they believe is, the others “true” self. Instead of forgiving, they hold the burden on the other person to exhibit zero trace of their old self regardless of what stimuli is presented to bring out their demons. Would you dangle drugs in front of a recovering addict then blame them for taking the bait? The same is true for someone recovering from any dark way. Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. Flaws aren’t easily forgotten as a way to keep one from rising above another. Some also hold onto other’s flaws and mistakes to make themselves feel better. In the end, forgiving someone is not about them it’s about ourselves.
The statute of limitations for ourselves all depends on self. While some forgive themselves quickly and others may hold onto their past. I’ve tried to understand my past and things that led up to who I was. I didn’t have to let my past affect me as it did and make me who I was, but I did. I was sinking in darkness and searched for answers through the world. My decisions back then led to more guilt and shame that could only be remedied by the next bad decision. I was unable to forgive myself and move past my old ways so I searched for others just as lost to make myself feel normal or tried to make others feel as I did. I was lost in utter darkness without anything or anyone to guide me out. I was unable to forgive myself because I blamed everything else for my problems and made unexplainable excuses for everything I did. I didn’t know how to truly change or forgive.
There are times now when things go wrong I forget about God’s loving grace and think I am being punished for my past but that is wrong. Life is suppose to have trials and tribulations to make us stronger. If all trials are looked upon as punishment the true lesson or growth can be missed. I believe we convict ourselves more than God does, especially when it comes to our past.
I am thankful for Jesus showing me a better way and waking me up to the truth of how I was living. Through reading the word of God I have learned how small actions of wrong can lead down a path of utter darkness. My words now contradict how I used to act but I know I am forgiven through Jesus and it is with that confidence I convict those old actions and know I am not a hypocrite because that is not who I am. I’m sure when some, who knew me before, may hear what I say now not truly believe or are skeptical. I believe that’s why it is said: “But Jesus said unto them, A prophet is not without honour, but in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.” Mark 6:4 KJV. Now, not saying I’m a prophet in any meaning of the word but the point is that people who know us from the past will be skeptical of change and not truly receive what might be said. It’s because of their inability to forgive.
In the end, what is the statute of limitations on hypocrisy? The statute lasts as long as we hold on. Hold on to regret, remorse, bitterness, pride, and not let go with forgiveness. “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32 NIV. “But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:15 NIV. God is limitless just as things can be over in an instant or last forever. “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 6:23 NIV. I pray you forgive someone. In Jesus name, Amen.
“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”
2 Corinthians 5:17
“Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.””
Matthew 19:26 NIV
33 and a Third 